Small Rye Big World: Initial Observations
I decided to move to Italy for three months without having ever been to Europe. I was going into it blind. All I knew was from what people had told me and from the movies. However, movies range from Under the Tuscan Sun to Taken, so what was I to know?
The going-in-blind approach left my mind racing with ideas every day of how my life was going to be. It easily fluctuated as well. One day, I would picture myself in a flowing dress, red wine in hand, dancing around a Tuscan farmhouse. Other days, I would picture myself gripping my bag as I walk through crowds of people trying to pick-pocket me.
I attest that neither of these extremes is true. I wish that someone had told me some realistic ideas of how to picture my life here because it would have either saved me from setting too high expectations or a lot of worries.
So here I am, with newly-adopted-European-wisdom, being that someone who tells you realistic ideas. Below are my observations about day-to-day life in Italy.
1) There is no rush for anything. The check will never be brought to you at a restaurant without your request. Your teacher will begin and end class at their leisure, and even stop mid-class to go get himself a coffee or a croissant. Trains leave later. Tour guides wait to begin the tour for you. You walk everywhere you go. They truly aren’t anticipating the next event. This was one of the hardest thing to adjust to as an American that is constantly on a time crunch and darting to the next task, but also one of the greatest things I’ve learned. There is no stress here, they just take their time to enjoy.
2) Going off there never being a rush for anything, I have to mention that dinner is an event here. Personally, dinner is my favorite part of the day, whether I am in America or Italy. Here, it is a minimal two-hour production that I adore. Traditionally, apertivo begins the meal. This commonly takes place at a separate restaurant, where drinks are served with a small appetizer of olives, chips, nuts, or cheeses. Getting asked to apertivo is an olive branch to friendship. It also tests out if you are enjoying yourself before committing to an entire evening meal. Genius. Then, you move to a restaurant. Antipasti is served first, which is a heavier appetizer like charcuterie or bruschetta. Next is primi, which is typically a small dish of pasta. Secondi is your meat, oftentimes served with contorni, which is a vegetable or potato. Then, of course, is dolce, which is dessert! It is a wonder to me that there is no obesity here. Dinner is no joke! It is truly enjoyed. Every course has a long time to complete and sit still before beginning the next flavor. This can make hasty Americans antsy, as we expect things exactly when we want them and hate to wait. Do not expect customer service. You don’t tip, so there is no reason for a waitress to try to gain your approval. They will not try to get you out of the restaurant by giving you the check. They won’t split the check either, might I add. They just let you enjoy your company until you ask for the check to leave. Learn to relish.
3) Italians are not as flirtatious as people make them out to be. Time after time before I left, people told me to “watch out for the Italian men.” I heard that they loved to finesse American women, especially blondes. People even told me to wear a fake wedding ring to stray them away. This has never been something I have experienced (or any of my friends, for that matter), which is hilarious that it is made out that way at home. While of course, girls are going to get hit on, there is no extreme amount of it here. If anything, I have gotten cat-called way more in America than I have here. I have a boyfriend, so I have not put myself out there for boys at all here, but even my single friends agree that boys are not prowling on us American girls. Do not worry about being harassed in the streets.
4) There is no reason to feel scared. In America, I refuse to pump gas alone at night. I clutch my pepper spray leaving the mall alone. Here, I walk the alleyways of this foreign country with no fear. I was pre-conditioned to feel on-edge here! My father was so worried about me being kidnapped and not being here to save me. Every day he told me to be smart and aware. While yes, I am always aware of my surroundings, I have never felt unsafe here. Florence is a pedestrian city and there are always people around. Nobody has tampered with my bags, looked at me maliciously, or even followed me. As always, take care of your belongings and be conscious, just do not let these Taken-induced stereotypes drive you away from this country.
5) Italy is a fashion show. I am in love with how Europeans dress. I have not seen one pair of sweatpants, a messy bun, a t-shirt, or a sweatshirt since I got here. People dress up every day. It makes you feel more confident. Again, nothing is rushed! Not even getting ready in the morning. Forget your t-shirts at home. Start wearing turtlenecks.
6) PDA is encouraged. Couples make out against buildings in the streets. Girls straddle their boyfriends on public benches. Bridges and cobblestone roads make for romantic dinner tables of wine and takeout, where people hold hands and rub each other’s thighs for all to see. People sit on the same side of the table and rest their heads on each other’s shoulders while they wait for their food. They kiss between bites! The best part of all of this is that it is NORMAL. Why did Americans make caring uncool? People breathe passion in this country and it’s contagious.
7) The secret to their skinniness: walking. You walk a bare minimum of 20,000 steps a day here. In America, I am happy when I get to 7,000. Italy is so active. You can eat as much pizza, pasta, bread, and gelato as you’d like when you’re moving that much. Wear the right shoes.
8) Water is not free. This has been one of my hardest adjustments. At home, I constantly have a water bottle in hand. However, unless you want to lug your giant Hydroflask full of tap water your 30-minute walk, you’re going to have to pay for water. There are no water fountains (aside from Rome, people drink from the fire hydrants there). Water isn’t even free if you order it at a restaurant. It is about 2 euro each for one liter of lukewarm water split. There’s no ice either. How Italian skin is so flawless with no water is beyond me, seeing that they cannot drink that much water. Pairing this with the extreme amount of walking was a lot for my water-privileged self to get used to.
9) Everyone speaks English. I thought I was going to come back to America in three months almost bilingual. What a joke that was. I’ve barely had to communicate in Italian at all. Aside from reading menus and signs, translating Italian is not something you have to do. Most all Italians also speak English, and if not, there is always a translator nearby. It is mind-blowing how smart these people are and how influential English is worldwide. We are so lucky to have it as our first language.
10) Euros are worth more than the American dollar. You can use your debit or credit card here, but American cash is not accepted. If you use your credit card, you’ll be charged an international fee on each transaction, but I believe this is just the difference between what a Euro is worth to a dollar. Just know when something seems cheap, like a 2 euro cup of gelato, you are spending more than that. It feels nice to think you’re spending less money, but in reality, you aren’t. But who cares, buy the 2 euro cup of gelato, there’s always money to be made. There’s not always Italian gelato to be eaten.
Sincerely,
Small Rye in a big world
